Do you see Him? Belonging begins with this one thing.

Aloha Friends,

Sin had isolated us, but Jesus stepped into the mess and took on the punishment for our sin, thereby acquiring peace with God on our behalf. By His stripes we were all healed. (Isaiah 53:5).

I grew up in a very close-knit extended family with many aunties and uncles. They all took turns caring for my brothers and I throughout our childhood as mom and dad worked. But despite all the family around me, I still found myself stranded on an island of my own.

In today’s newsletter we begin looking at ways to cultivate belonging.

I was a boy growing up with gender incongruity or dysphoria along with same sex attractions. This was my secluded island, and no one would know until I got to the last inch before the end of my rope. I was 15 years old and had already contemplated ways to end my life in the least painful way possible. I had prayed to God since I was five years old, maybe even four, asking him to help me but help never came. I didn’t wake up from my sleep as a girl (like I prayed many nights before), nor was I free of the shameful feelings I did my best to hide.

One day after school, I was feeling the weight of the world on my shoulders, and I felt a pull to withdraw to a private stretch of beach near my home (pictured above). I had been there many times before, but not on my own.

No one was there on the mile-long stretch of shoreline and as soon as I sat on the sand the flood gates of my heart burst open and poured out of my eyes in heaping sobs.

“Why did you make me like this?! Why do you want to send me to hell when I never asked for this?”

No answer.

As the sobbing slowed down, I gazed upon the horizon, the crashing waves and sea spray washed over me. I began to become fixated on the beauty of my home. My sobbing stopped and I sat and watched the birds swoop down into the deep waters.

I felt grateful. I began to thank God for what He created.

I found joy and meaning.

I found God.

I felt Him in the breeze, and He kissed my cheek with salty sprays.

This stretch of beach would become my sanctuary for the next two years. I would show up with tears and isolation but leave fully known and fully loved. I didn’t understand it all back then, but I just knew it was keeping me alive.

The first step to finding belonging is to come back to the one Whom we belong. Many of us, especially our children, spend most of our time behind artificial screens and walls.

Romans 1:19-20 tells us that God’s invisible qualities, and His nature is made visible in His creation.

And this is what I discovered to be true without knowing that verse existed. 

If you want a practical activity to begin cultivating a sense of belonging for yourself or to help a young person in your life – step outside, into creation. The earth is the Lords, and the fullness thereof (Psalm 24:1).

But do it intentionally.

Find activities outdoors that fit your lifestyle or just take weekly/monthly time outs to find a spot, sit and look for Him.

1)    Start with prayer and ask the Lord to give you eyes to see Him.

2)    Establish a safe place and environment for whatever emotions well up.

3)    Find things to be grateful for and offer Him praise. I remember thanking Him for the various shades of blue and being so amazed that I never noticed them before.

4)    Journal or discuss the ways God revealed Himself in His creation.

5)    Connect your experiences or the natural phenomenon you observe to scripture or Biblical stories.

6)    Make this a weekly or monthly rhythm and you will develop a habit for “seeing God” everywhere you go.

You could end up on a truly secluded island and never feel alone because cultivating belonging begins with slowing down and cultivating awareness of our Father and Creator.

We were not meant to be islands. Jesus has bridged the gap for us all and it began with reconnecting us back to the Father.

We hope this blessed you.

With love,

Joshua and the Explicit team.