Cultivating a Sense of Belonging for a Lonely Heart

Aloha Friends, 

From the well to the wilderness, Scripture reveals how deeply rejection can wound the human heart.

Jesus met a Samaritan woman at a well in the middle of the day. She was most likely avoiding other women and their judgments about her life decisions. The New Testament writers do not offer much backstory about her or her life experiences. However, we can confidently say that Jesus knew everything there was to know about her, and He was not ashamed to speak with her.

This reminds me of the name El Roi, the God who sees, as expressed by an Egyptian handmaiden named Hagar. She was made to lie with her master’s husband and was forced to leave shortly after her master had her own son. It was in the desert, as she waited for death to take her son, that God intervened and saved them.

These stories capture the all too familiar sting of rejection, abandonment, and social exclusion. I cannot help but wonder how far back the patterns of rejection go for these two women. We know that Jesus confirmed the woman at the well had five husbands and was currently with another man. We can deduce that she must have endured at least five heartbreaks or losses, not to mention the stigma attached to such a life.

Hagar was a slave from another country. She was property, to be sold or given away. With so much humanity stripped from you, how could you not experience deep disappointment and abandonment?

In Genesis 2:18, the Lord God said,

“It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.”

This was not only about marriage, but it was also intentional design. The Creator made mankind to be social beings who multiply and fill the earth with the Image of God, thereby taking dominion.

We are wired for belonging.

Neuroscience echoes this biological truth by revealing that social rejection, exclusion, and relational loss activate many of the same brain regions involved in physical pain. The pain of loneliness is real. I am sure many of you reading this right now can relate.

But God never forsakes, or abandons us.

Jesus never made excuses for people’s behavior, but He met them where they were and offered a solution: Himself. He truly is the answer to all of life’s pain and sorrow.

Loneliness, in all its forms, can find its end in Him.

In the following weeks, we will dig into the root of loneliness and discover how it manifests in the life of the Image bearer through broken identity, sexual dysfunction, codependency and addiction. We will learn how to heal and overcome it by cultivating belonging, community, and building rhythms of communion with God and others. Look out for some practical activities and conversation starters as well!

If you are reading this while navigating a season of rejection, social exclusion, or abandonment, please know that the Lord sees you. El Roi, is not just a title, it is a reality. We invite you to stay with us as we go deeper into communion with Him together.

Allow loneliness to propel you closer to Him and you will find that you were never abandoned.

Be encouraged by Psalm 34:18 (NLT):



“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; He rescues those whose spirits are crushed.”

He is with us.

Sincerely,

Explicit Movement