We need a moment.

Aloha Friends,

Tamar’s story was a heavy one.

Before we move forward, I want to pause with you. There is no need to rush into another lesson. Sometimes we need a little room to breathe and let what we have read settle.

Over these past few weeks, we have been asking what lies beneath someone's desire to numb themselves.

As we pause, here are a few things I hope we will carry with us.

Our emotions need somewhere safe to go. Sadness, anger, loneliness and grief can be brought honestly before God. We do not have to feel better before we come to Him.

It helps to look beneath the behavior. When we or our young people keep reaching for distraction, we can gently ask, “What am I feeling, and what do I need?” Understanding the hurt can help us respond with compassion and wisdom while still addressing harmful choices.

Lament gives pain a voice, and love listens. We can tell God what hurts. We can also become people who listen without rushing to explain, correct or make everything feel better. When someone has been harmed, that love includes protection and appropriate help.

We can take one small step at a time. We do not have to unpack every painful experience today. Rest, laughter and enjoying something good can also have a place in healing. We can receive those gifts without forcing ourselves to be cheerful.

This week, try something simple with your family or someone you trust. Share a meal, take a walk or sit outside together. Ask, “What would help you feel cared for today?” Let each person answer—or pass. There is no need to turn the moment into a lesson.

Perhaps what someone needs is conversation. Perhaps it is quiet company. Perhaps it is permission to rest.

My hope is that our homes and churches become places where people can tell the truth about how they are doing and know they will still be loved because we are equipped to respond to the hard stuff. The best response being PRESENCE.

May His Kingdom come, on earth as it is in heaven.

With love,

Joshua and the Explicit Movement ʻOhana